boobies

Iskra Lawrence Shared a Compelling Message About Body Dysmorphia and Disordered Eating

Photo: Instagram / @iskra

We all know Iskra Lawrence for breaking down society's standards of beauty and encouraging people to strive for happiness, not a number on the scale. The body-positive role model has appeared in countless Aerie campaigns with zero retouching and is always posting inspirational and motivational messages on the 'gram.

In her most recent post, in honor of National Eating Disorders Awareness Week, she opened up about her struggles with body dysmorphia and disordered eating. "I want to combat the stigma around this mental illness," she wrote alongside side-by-side photos of herself. The photo of the left shows Lawrence airbrushed and Photoshopped to an almost unrecognizable degree; on the right, a photo of her today, rocking a bikini on the beach, truly happy with being "perfectly imperfect."

"I wish I had known that Photoshop and retouching didn't make me perfect or beautiful," she wrote. "Also that I didn't have to be a 'male fantasy.' Look how posed the pic on the left is, how squished my poor boobies are. This was again another societal fantasy I thought as a woman I was expected to be." (Related: Iskra Lawrence On Why You Don't Need a Body-Positive Reason to Share a Bikini Pic)

Lawrence spent years of her career as a model, thinking she was supposed to look a certain way in order to fit in. "When I started modeling, I was so focused on the scale, so focused on looking a certain way, that I didn't even realize I had a mental health issue," she previously told Shape. "I was working out so hard, to the point where I was dizzy and my eyesight would become blurry. I was obsessively writing down how many calories I was consuming, and my diet was so poor that I was constantly tired and would often fall asleep in the middle of the day. Despite that, mentally, I always felt like a failure because I could never reach the aesthetic or standard I'd set for myself or what I thought society expected of me." (Related: Why Body-Shaming Is Such a Big Deal—and What You Can Do to Stop It)

Blinded by obsession over changing her appearance, Lawrence was ignoring all the signals her body was giving her. "It was basically screaming that I was hurting myself, but I continued to ignore it until one day, something just clicked," she said. "I stopped trying to alter what I looked like and accepted my body as it was. With that, I also gave up on dieting, restriction, and everything else that was damaging my body and self-esteem."

Since then, Lawrence has worked hard to become comfortable in her skin. One of the most valuable lessons she's learned is that she's worth so much more than what she sees in the mirror. "I've never felt more beautiful or sexy just being the real me, and knowing that I'm loved because I'm me not some fantasy or perfected illusion," she continued to share in her post. "That my value wasn't based on a set of measurements, a number on the scale or the size I wear." (Related: Iskra Lawrence On Why You Should Look Beyond That Numerical Weight-Loss Goal)

Today, her goal is to continue sharing that inspiring message with women to encourage them to love their bodies as they are and to have more open and honest conversations about disordered eating and self-image. "I know now that my body is mine and therefore perfectly imperfect and my home to be cherished," she wrote. "I'm grateful I'm here to tell my story when there are too many lives being lost from this mental illness. I hope that someday you share your story because we need more representation when we talk about eating disorder recovery. Sending you all so much love and hope that you will tell yourself today and every day that you love yourself too."

If you or someone you know is struggling with an eating disorder, NEDA's toll-free, confidential helpline (800-931-2237) is here to help.

02

Wisconsin school ending cheerleading awards for 'big boobie' and 'big booty' after ACLU letter

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Feb. 21, 2019, 12:11 AM GMT / Updated Feb. 21, 2019, 5:17 PM GMT

By Elisha Fieldstadt

A Wisconsin high school won't be giving out awards like “big booty” to cheerleaders this year after the American Civil Liberties Union sent a letter to the district detailing complaints from multiple parents and staffers.

Tremper High School, part of the Kenosha Unified School District, has been holding an annual award ceremony for cheerleaders for at least five years. In 2017, along with standard honors, such as for "hardest worker," awards for “big boobie” and “big booty” were given, according to the ACLU's letter.

The following year, the “string bean award” for the skinniest cheerleader was added to the lineup, the letter said.

And in prior years, the coaches, at least some of whom are female, made comments about the girls' vaginas during the ceremony, which is held for between 100 and 150 people, including family and friends of the cheerleaders and Kenosha Unified School District staff, the ACLU said

During the 2018 awards, a parent told the ACLU that "coaches 'laughed hysterically' when handing the big boobie award to its recipient and made comments on the microphone about 'what a feat' it was that this student could maneuver through cheer routines with her 'enormous boobs,'" the letter said.

According to the ACLU's letter, the winner of the “big booty” award was greeted with this commentary: “We love her butt. Everybody loves her butt."

After the 2018 ceremony, a female coach for another sport at the school emailed both the principal, Steven Knecht, and one of the cheerleading coaches, according to the ACLU's letter.

"'The last thing these high school girls need is a fellow woman in their lives communicating to them that they are objects or that their appearance is something to be gawked at, demeaned, laughed at, or even awarded for that matter,'" she wrote to the cheerleading coach, the ACLU letter said.

The cheerleading coach responded, "I honestly don’t feel that I need to explain myself about how we ran our banquet. Actually we have ran it this way for years and have never had a problem," according to the ACLU's letter, which did not identify the coach.

The principal afterward told the cheerleading coaches that after complaints from four people, he would be investigating the awards. But he later told a concerned parent that he "could find no evidence of wrongdoing on the part of the coaches," according to the ACLU.

When the parent "insisted Mr. Knecht had missed something," he responded that the awards “were meant to be funny” and the coaches were just joking around," recounted the ACLU's letter.

When a parent went to the district with concerns, the district's chief of school eadership reiterated Knecht's response, according to the ACLU.

But later in 2018, a human resources official for the district met with the head cheerleading coach and told her to apologize to each student who received a “gag award" and resign, the ACLU said. The coach apologized, but refused to resign. Knecht had made it clear that she was welcome to continue coaching, according to the ACLU.

Neither Knecht nor the district's chief of student leadership, Susan Valeri, responded to requests for comments from NBC News.

Tanya Ruder, the Kenosha Unified School District chief communications officer, said in a statement that "a clear expectation has been set that awards of this nature are not acceptable and are not to be given at Tremper cheerleading banquets going forward."

Emma Roth, who works for the ACLU's Women's Rights Project, said the school notified the ACLU that the awards in question will not be given out this year. The other change to the ceremony this year is that parents won't be invited, Roth said.

The ACLU's letter, which threatened to "explore all available legal remedies" against the district, said the Tremper cheerleading awards aren't the only issues of gender discrimination against girls on the cheering squad and other female students at the high school and in the district at large.

"In addition to these awards, parents have reported that the Tremper Cheer coaches have regularly engaged in harassing language towards the cheerleaders during practices," the ACLU letter said.

Further, a dress code at the high school that "administrators have selectively enforced" against female students banned yoga pants, leggings and tank tops, according to the ACLU.

At another Kenosha school, Bradford High School, students in a health class were made to watch a movie in which a female college freshman is drugged and raped. "The students were then told to fill out a worksheet that asked, 'What could have Melissa done differently to have avoided her sexual assault (provide at least 4 examples)?'" the ACLU's letter said.

"This question squarely places the blame for a sexual assault on the victim, rather than the perpetrator who drugged and raped her," the letter said.

The ACLU urged the district to discipline staff involved with the cheerleading awards and provide mandatory anti-harassment training for all district employees and written guidelines "prohibiting school officials from commenting on students’ physical appearances."

The civil liberties group is also asking for the district to release a review they conducted regarding the offending health class curriculum.

Roth, with the ACLU, said they had "received a cursory response" from the district.

"The ACLU and ACLU of Wisconsin will continue to press KUSD to respond appropriately to these incidents and to reform and enforce its policies so that all students are treated equally, regardless of gender," Asma Kadri-Keeler, an ACLU of Wisconsin staff attorney, said in a statement released to NBC News Wednesday.

Tremper High School previously made headlines when a U.S. District Court judge ruled in 2017 that a transgender boy could use the boys' restroom after teachers and administrators at the school told him he could not.

The district appealed the decision, and after the ruling was upheld by appeals court judges, school officials petitioned to appeal that ruling in the U.S. Supreme Court.

In 2018, the school board changed course, and voted 5 to 2 to settle a lawsuit over the matter and withdraw its petition to the high court.

Elisha Fieldstadt is a breaking news reporter for NBC News.

03

Need a true escape? Trade cell service for friendly seals at this Mexican glamping resort

A tent at Camp Cecil in Isla Espiritu Santo.

Keenan Shoal/Todos Santos Eco Adventures

There must have been at least 300 of them, sea lions in all sizes and colours – some glistening ebony, others silvery blue, still others almost ivory-hued. Some were perched on boulders sleeping soundly, others sunned themselves on their backs and sides. Babies crawled on top of bigger ones to find a good spot to snuggle, while adolescent pups bounded off the rocks to play in the water. The scene could be likened to a school playground gone mad, but instead of children shouting and squealing, the soundtrack was one of cacophonous barking.

We had come to this protected sea-lion colony in Baja California Sur by boat from our accommodations further down the coast of Isla Espiritu Santo. The small island in the Sea of Cortez, part of a UNESCO Biosphere Reserve and a World Heritage Site, lies an hour’s boat ride from the Mexican city of La Paz. One of the most biodiverse areas on the planet, its permanent and part-time non-human residents include black jackrabbits and antelope squirrels – two species endemic to the island – blue whales, humpback whales, dolphins, sea lions, whale sharks, manta rays, sea turtles, dolphins, blue-footed boobies, frigate birds and pelicans.

The island itself is stunning, with towering cliffs in surreal shapes; white sand bays; awe-inducing lava rock formations; and rock art left by the extinct Guaycura and Pericu Indians. I was staying at Camp Cecil, a sustainable glamping outfit that attracts eco-minded travellers and nature and wildlife lovers looking to get off the grid (no WiFi or cellphone service here). It’s an opportunity to experience outdoor adventure, animal encounters and total relaxation – without having to truly rough it.

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Visitors of Isla Espiritu Santo are treated towering cliffs, white sand bays, awe-inducing lava rock formations and rock art left by the extinct Guaycura and Pericu Indian.

Elizabeth Warkentin/The Globe and Mail

Of course, when it comes to nature, nothing is guaranteed. After tiring of trying to take decent photos of the seals from a rocking boat, I slipped into the water with the rest of my group, trying not to make a splash – we’d been warned against any surprise moves that could scare the animals. Ahead of me, a Mexican tourist was smiling and shouting happily to his friends: Increible! “Incredible!” I looked up just in time to see a pup, no more than two feet long, twirling his body around the man’s neck before retreating underwater. All around me, other visitors seemed to be having similar joyful experiences.

But too soon, our boat’s allotted 90 minutes at the colony was up, and still I hadn’t had my own personal encounter. As I swam back, feeling disheartened, I suddenly felt a weight land on the back of my neck. I screamed. I looked and felt behind me, but found nothing. Then I turned and looked down into the water, and there he was: The cheeky little rascal had disappeared, only to materialize a few feet before me and peer at me impishly with big black eyes – as if to say, “Got you, didn’t I?” And then he (or perhaps it was a she?) was off.

Arriving back at Camp Cecil an hour later, I was famished. (An adrenaline-filled morning with exuberant sea mammals will do that to you.) As usual, the meal at the boutique encampment was an event. Ivan, a young Italian chef who has worked in large hotel kitchens in Milan and California, and his Mexican assistant, Giovanni, produced a multitude of culinary delights in their solar-powered kitchen: fajitas, white-bean soup, quinoa salad, quesadillas, mango mousse. Every dish was more fresh, flavourful and enticing than the last, and they even prepared a special vegan ceviche for me and the two vegetarians on the trip.

Travellers looking to get off the grid can visit the camp, which has no WiFi or cellphone service.

Greg Fisher/Todos Santos Eco Adventures

It’s all in keeping with the ethos of the camp, opened in 2016 by Bryan and Sergio Jauregui, owners of Todos Santos Eco Adventures. The married couple is proud of their home region here in southern Baja California, and work to show off the area to its best advantage while minimizing tourism’s footprint on the environment. Camp Cecil runs entirely on solar power, has eliminated single-use plastics and sources its seafood from two local fisherman who were given permission to stay after Espiritu Santo was declared part of a national marine park. “They’re 89 and 91 years old now,” said Hernando, one of our naturalist guides, “but they still fish every day.”

Conversation at mealtimes was easy and animated. During one meal, a guest recounted how she had woken the night before to an animal lying on her chest. Scared – and thinking it was a rat – she pushed the creature off. “No, no,” said our guides Hernando and Mauricio, both of whom did double duty as attentive hosts. “The animal who visited your tent was a babisuri,” Mauricio explained. “Babisuri are a ring-tailed cat subspecies. They’re found only on Espiritu Santo. Nowhere else.”

“We call him Poncho,” Hernando added.

Time on the island passed in a slow, natural rhythm, matching the gentle cadence of the lapping waves. Guests at Camp Cecil can be as adventurous or hedonistic as they wish. Between meals, you can laze on the beach in the sun, breathing in the heady scent of the salty sea and arid desert air. Or you can collect shells, look for little orange crabs on the rocks and, even in January when I visited, go for a swim. More active types opt to kayak to the frigate-bird colony, paddle a SUP to the next cove or explore the rock cave at the end of the beach. On my second afternoon, I went on a guided desert hike. Along the way to the lookout point, we spotted sun-bleached animal bones, likely those of a jackrabbit, giant agave and other desert plants. I was stunned to see cacti twice the height and three times the girth of a large man.

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The sun sets early in Mexico in January, and as my companions and I sipped grapefruit margaritas at happy hour on our final evening, we gazed upon a classic Baja tableau: silhouettes of frigate birds soaring high in the tangerine sky above a purple sea, and the serrated forms of mountains along the distant coastline.

It had been a long day, and I retired early. Camp Cecil may be a sustainable outfit, but Bryan and Sergio haven’t held back on the accommodations. My tent, a large white-canvas affair, was furnished with sisal matting, a colourful rug, a wicker armchair, a solar fan and a hurricane lantern. The bed was a plush-top queen adorned with pillows and throws in shades of coral and peach. The bed was flanked on both sides by folding butler’s trays, each with its own glass candle-holder.

Married couple Bryan and Sergio Jauregui opened Camp Cecil in 2016, and work to show the southern Baka California region while minimizing tourism’s footprint on the environment.

Elizabeth Warkentin/The Globe and Mail

That night, after picking my way back down the path from the compost toilet cabana, I gazed at the indigo sky – awash with brilliant crystal studs – and the whiteness of the tents, opalescent against the constellations above. I hoped I would fall back asleep quickly, wrapped in dreams of frolicking sea lions and mischievous ring-tailed cats.

Your Turn

You can fly direct to San Jose del Cabo (Los Cabos) from Toronto, Vancouver, Calgary or Edmonton. The car ride from the airport to Todos Santos, where Todos Santos Eco Adventures is based, takes about a hour and 15 minutes. Alternatively, drive to La Paz (a little over two hours), the capital of Baja California Sur, a charming little city in which to spend a few days before meeting guides for the boat trip to Isla Espiritu Santo.

Rates at Camp Cecil start at US$375 per person, based on double occupancy, minimum two-night stay required. That includes hotel pickup/drop-off in Todos Santos or La Paz, round-trip boat transfer to Camp Cecil, snorkelling gear and wetsuit, all meals from lunch on day one through breakfast on your final day, daily happy hour, all adventures, luxury tent accommodations and bilingual naturalist guide. All adventures, transfers and meals are on a shared basis unless special arrangements are made (tosea.net).

The writer was a guest of Todos Santos Eco Adventures. It did not review or approve this article.

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